Differing Perceptions for Difficult conversations in the work force

In class today, two of my peers are presenting on the topic of difficult conversations in the workplace. I'm going to focus on one part of the article that my classmates sent, and that is differing perceptions in the workplace. Personally this topic is very interesting to me because as future managers, we need to know the tools and tips on how to appropriately have difficult conversations with co workers. The first thing I found intriguing in the article that was sent to us was revolved around the phrase "assumptions about intent." This basically means that in a difficult situation, we think we know the intentions of the other person, while in reality we truly don't. Most of the time people don't explicitly state their intention during a situation, causing it to be unfair to truly think we know what their purpose was. This could cause a divide in the organization because the worker is going to feel like he is being judged by his manager. Individuals tend to assume they know someone's intent because they feel the impact of the actions of the other person. In other words, individuals might feel hurt by the difficult situation causing them to think that the other person had a malicious intent. This statement sets up the next important piece which is the overall feelings of individuals. Situations, especially difficult ones, can cause a person to become extremely passionate which can affect our ability to think and problem solve in an appropriate fashion. In the article my classmates sent, one of the quotes was," when we are very upset, and have not successfully communicated our feelings, it is not possible to listen." This quote meant a lot to me because I have witnessed this happen numerous times while working. Personally, I've seen customers upset me, which causes me to forget what my manager asked me to do before she left. Controlling your emotions is vital in having any conversations with managers, but it can be hard when the situation is difficult. In many bad situations, feelings tend to be the nucleus of what caused these instances to occur. Unfortunately, people have become really good at masking their emotions which can lead a manager to having a difficult time reading the true feelings their colleague is expressing. In my opinion the worst thing to do in a difficult situation is to blame the other person without knowing the true intent or story. The article states that focusing on blame is very ineffective because it blocks our ability to learn what really happened in the situation and most importantly how to correct it in the future. As stated before, blaming someone is making judgments on their intent in the situation. An effective manager cannot be known for casting blame during a situation because the co workers are going to feel vulnerable. Instead, the manager should sit down with the individual and talk out the situation with him, as well as truly listen to his side of the story. These three points really show how difficult situations arise in the workplace. In class today, I'm hoping to learn some tools on how to correct these three points and I will reflect on it in my next blog post.